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knit this into a story on uppers. esoteric essay doesn't have to be perfect more feeling and experience based the fire influence use it ride it and disown it later thats fine but now lean into it. needn't explain. can cut later. but get compelling interesting piece together here and show.


that requires independence of thought and feeling in contrast to the mandates of a society that is NOT cultivating your highest good, like the age d'or silliness (even the alternative justification, libido or love, is revealed to be imperfect and a faulty compensation for it has its own issues)

instead, we all want to give ourselves to something that IS cultivating the highest good. Yarvin says that monarchism is most likely to do that on a societal scale, but what about in this reality? Do we just hide in our online fiefdoms of like-minded, an elitism parallel to monasteries in the dark ages, close urbit groups or group chats but never in person, around you, in the place you grew up or might want to raise a family?

Some are created utopian communities but these depend again on everyone being of like mind preemptively and to a level that is perhaps extreme, willing to cut off those outside.

the that instead finds this meaning in extant middle american life. Not the elitist monkish snobbism of the nerds nor the craven tedious snobbism of the hipsters, though both are welcome in that world.

its Pfest and Pfilm


That which follows negation is the weight that makes the wheel turn and the cycle continue. It is spring. It is being born. That which follows negation depends on negation. For without negation the wheel will rust. But without that the wheel does not turn.






"I came up with it in a total rush. After having stayed up all night on deadline, it just came to me right after the sun rose. I didn’t realize people would be like, "Oh shit, another poem." It just came out to be what it was– sorry. If you think about it, the driver of the screw has one job and he is always trying to change things. But the idler wheel is there and has this great effect on what the gears do; the idler wheel knows the machine much better than just this one thing that’s performing this one task. For the second line, I had read about whipping cords in a nautical book that my last boyfriend had. I read that when ropes get frayed at sea, you can repair the frayed ends of the ropes with whipping cords that are very strong.... I had a choice between teaching somebody how to avoid trouble, or teaching them how to get out of it, I’d teach them how to get out of it."







  1. rat 4d

  2. synchronicity

  3. ludibrium


earthy coomer

middle american

mystic flight



both trying to break the subjective obsession and cultivate its healthy proportion

avoiding coominducing things that are justified by community, like most drugs and parties

there is a role for parties and partying but it goes too far quite fast in the contemporary mode

it's more socially acceptable to advertise drug-deep public mock-orgies on the same facebook as your mom sees than it is to express an unorthodox political opinion in person.

conservatism the big bad bear. coomer/zoomer freedom the cool chic flair. I don't like either

artfulness the solution. There - negate. supremely blest is that beyond the scare.the passions are the source of vitality, but if they cross past reason and keep going, they lose shape, they are no longer passionate



the GENERATIVE thesis - plummetting living standards and destruction of culture - rejection of this for regular people not only monopolists



"a novel on several levels is revealed, and these "levels" are not the customary "levels of meaning" of modernist criticism but planes in a fictive space, rather like those houses of memory in medieval mnemonic science, where words, facts, and numbers were stored till wanted in various rooms and attics, or like the Houses of astrology into which the heavens are divided." inherently social, political. Beyond solipsism. Beyond showing off because the inscrutability isn'tthe point. The scrutinizing is. In a sense, Nabokov isn't modernist but 'that'


contra pornografitization

one can appreciate tap into and rechannel the vital forces without always cooming. One needn't use knowledge as a replacement for action, one can decide which actions to pursue and pursue them well, on a level elevated from mere cooming. That's art


not driven by vanity but but something more deliberate,, skill meaning etc

passion and aesthetic impulse inform this but do not define it



in a sense the extinction group, the zoomer art scene, the irony wrapped in irony, this is a new aesthetic - the schizoposting, the not reacting emotionally to things that in theory should solicit emotion - the smoothing the cooling as a reaction to the solipsism, confusing sentimentality and sensitivity. But That is not like them. That is not afraid of sensitivity and needn't make fun of itself as a prerequisite for engaging with it, though it does make fun of itself at appropriate moments, not so provincial after all.








to relate with others not primarily for our own pleasure, though our curiosity may be driven by pleasure, to try and see where they are and allow an infrastructure to form between you before

more conservative

depth of commitment

the ludus, the that, the artistry is in how deliberate and where you express it, not coomer immediate willy nilly

to be able to trust what someone says to your face and behind your back, to be that person too, to behave with dignity (negate coomerdom, whether sexual, emotional, etc, as much as possible"


as my friend once said: its not that we all agree its that we have the same metanorms

let the occasional asshole blunder through the chinashop of transgression and thats the cost of keeping the store public


"It would appear to be unseasonable to go in search of a cod



Disaffected liberals wish to use the GOP as a battering ram against the excesses of woke culture by putting a doorstep in place, returning to a previous liberalism where they were contented. This group abhors the idea of social conservatism as it champions that of individual liberty, and the libertinism that naturally flows from it. “Whatever you do is none of my business, so long as it doesn’t affect me personally”, is the credo.


This vs surrealism Carl anarchy nihilism abyss 


That which comes after negation 

The irrational but ordered, the pre-enlightenment in the post-crypto-lib modern


Inverse of the Writing re theistic satanism 

Beyond the moral or carnal marketplace

Things are resolved here and they are simple even if they change and must be resolved again


The ability to curate create meaning 


deliberate goals and standards. allowing the game you play to change but not the standards which you apply to it.



Neither does oversharing

What do you talk about when you talk? 

Buñuel memoir. Almosts, just a few real things, all this is enough. In between and some history but not obsessed with determining it

Normal life 

Yet on more honest bases

Neither left or right wing

But doggedly boisterously  individual conservative etc 

Case by case and yet consistent

inarticulatable but observable

Like my friend Barrett says, America is inherently post Marxist, baudrillard, etc

Negation then the that

What do you know about freedom? Impulse is not freedom. It’s not without check - surrealism isn’t that. 

Not in Buñuel’s understanding anyways.

Don’t be a cuck, negate that

Then the that fills in 

"For the first time in my life I'd come into contact with a coherent moral systyem that, as far as I could tell, had no flaws. It was an aggressive morality based on the complete rejection of all existing values. We had other criteria: we exalted passion, mystification, black humor, the insult, and the call of the abyss. Inside this new territory, all our thoughts and actions seemed justifiable; there was simply no room for doubt. Everything made sense. Our morality may have been more demanding and more dangerous than the prevailing order, but it was also stronger, richer, and more coherent." My Last sigh p 107

the that rejects the call of the abyss

not everything is justifiable:

coercion is disallowed

projection too

depth over breadth

joy over pleasure

truth over impulse

except when both are served

not the corrupted, commodified, rehearsed, roles of bdsm, but the swift and lusty grab of the lover's cheek, neck. the animal, not the civilized animal. civility, not civilization.

negation, doubt without fear

with animal/liveliness - immanent


to not grasp not even reprimand except as is necessary

Trad hypocrisy has no place here

Porny has no place here

Just elegant dignity real animal



An absolutely mentally unhinged girl who doesn't even care about me at all but just wants the marriage box checked no matter what and tries to pressure me into it all the time is very possibly one of the hottest things I can imagine


I love fake traditionalism, I love people obsessed with random insane ideas, I want to be used as an engine in a mentally ill 20s girl's psychosexual fantasies acquired online, I love this #BasedWorld that me and my friends summoned out ot the aether through our willpowers alone.

The crassness of meme world versus the reality depicted

He is the aromantic one avoiding responsibility via fantasy

The porn of the thing





That comes after negation

Negation being removal of scales but maintenance of dignity not idiocy

Doesn’t have to be mnietszchr 

As opposed to fin de siecle degeneracy, trad larp coomerism, and various humbertesque games and narratives of justification of pleasure beyond it's place in the cyclical nature of life w Freud eyes wide shut


that is what comes after the right negations

carnivalesque, cosmic cycle

quote bakhtin

quote mcluhan




It's great how these guys just love being the stereotype as much as possible. They seem happy

Dismissive of the power of power - contemporary power literally unacknowledged. None of its tropes or norms or linguistic reformations followed or rebelled against.

Showy in perception, framing, content, but not technically


living up to responsibilities and not weighing others down with them - and disentangling with dignity if that's what must happen. No glory in shirking and excuses.



family, community, but also rebellious


notions of independence and interdependence - where, with whom, why?

local, global?





I have discarded romanticism as sentimental. I am nearing the end of my satire phase as it has it's limits- not generative enough. modernist intertextuality/revamp of occultism are technique, not genre; humanism is corny, if true; muscular christianity is boring, if good.

vitalism, spirit & adventure remain compelling, so long as they evade wish fulfillment. I'd like to see these crossed w questions of surveillance, authorship, [digital] identity, privacy(aka humanity in face of NWO). I suppose this is'cyberpunk' ? But that term makes my brain go numb

I imagine ppl might suggest a Pynchon bleeding edge, or a fake accounts, or an anime, but those are aesthetically dead to me. not lively, not new, I don't detest them. sO what is this newness I seek, why do they not have it?


I like history and meaning and riting it out

And I like surrealism and absurdity because they are necessary for survival in the modern. To go forward and not be a nostalgist sentimentalist utopian which is actually a sin

But also to not be a godless making oneself into a god or a hedonist playing without limit accelerationsm (blackpill just as sentimental as utopianism)


contingent - that is the balance

contingent on setting, not trad, not retvrn


Nabokov on artist's power




  • Rain Curtain

  • Spectre of Finance Punk

  • Snow on tha Bluff

  • RSO (talking about that but not that itself)

  • love on the line


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